Been Way Too Long...

Yes, I know.
Haven't really had much to say, I'm afraid...not sure I have much to say now, LOL. Most of my venting I get out on other social media, so I may be spent.

My time as of late has been spent recharging, fighting the system, taking care of my clowder, and recording my album. Since my last post (back in November?! Daaaayum), I think my extended family has had to bury more members, I've had an anniversary, I've gained another immediate member for the clowder, and I've managed to get several bookings at several anime- or manga- or comic-related events (or, to be more accurate, my management has). Much of this has been blocked by the proverbial "haters" (not to mention the really weird subtle stalking and outright harassment), who can partake in a vessel of phallic objects. I even hear tell they'd like to continue the Confusion Campaign by attempting to infiltrate the circuit in my immediate area. Why they want to do that when they have perfectly good opportunities in their area is beyond me, but who knows what goes on in the apparently miserable realm of Off-The-Map. "Here there be monsters," indeed.

Just look at them all.

Anyhoo.

It's been really good to work with my brother, PoppaRazi, again. I think he and I have a good rapport once we figure out WTF we're doing, and fall into a groove. Oddly enough, the years he spent in GA, he didn't create much, and neither did I, but once we were back in each other's spaces, we did a lot better. It took me a minute to get going, and I ended up doing a lot of writing before I had to record--sometimes on the same day. Along the way, I was told I helped some people to get inspired again, to love what they do as far as being recording artists and finding their muses again. If that's all I've accomplished with making this bloody album, that's actually satisfactory.

Ohhh...yessss.

One thing I've discovered whilst getting ready to record and doing some shows along the way, is that some people still aren't ready to accept me. Hasn't stopped me yet, but it can be disheartening at times; I'm human. I take the advice of people who are close enough to me to care but not sycophantic and can be honest. They seem to think that it's just the people who are used to things being a certain way that are the problem. That's mainly why I chose anime/manga/comic events, because nekomimi don't even get a side eye there. Unfortunately, in some of these cases, the fact that I'm not full-on Japanese seems to be an issue. Another issue is that people hear "hip-hop" and immediately think the worst. And I suspect that my perceived sexuality was an issue at at least one LGBTQ event, and that might have carried over into my chances for the one coming up. You would think that my sexuality would be the last thing an LGBTQ event would be concerned about, but I'm guessing it's based on the perception I gave, having had been pregnant at the time. (Still bi when I'm pregnant and with a man, guys! Ya shoulda asked!)

I mean, really.

It don't matter. Nah worry we.

Other people around us are finding that gaining access to stuff in the Brick City area is like some Ark-of-the-Covenant guarded secret--it's not just me who feels this way. So, the solution is simple: kick down more doors. Either way, we're getting our messages out there and having fun at the same time. Not gonna do any of us any good to kvetch about it--we have to be proactive. Pave our own paths. That's what innovators do. If we fail, we just do it again, after finding out what didn't work the first time.

You fall...you recover, you get back up, you keep going. Nurse your injuries if you have to, but srsly--get. Up.

Like she's about to do. Just without an Agent chasing you.

#LoveWins...Or Does it?

Okay-- admittedly, the title of this blog prolly smells of clickbait. But it's no less a valid question. Is this statement really true? Did love win?

In a HUGE way, yes--yes, it did. And yet, while same-sex couples all over the nation celebrate this landmark victory for the LGBTQIA community, there are some members who are definitely being overlooked...and since I happen to be one of them, I felt I had to speak up on it.

I identify as a bisexual woman. Yeh, I said it. I came out to my parents a few years ago (bye-bye to the hopes of the haters who planned to out me to them--too late, bxtches! They KNOW), and my true friends and family have always known. My partner-in-life knows and has always known. He doesn't care. He isn't intimidated. And his culeness with it isn't because he thinks he's gonna be up to his twins in wall-to-wall poontang, if that's what you're thinking. He accepts it because it's a part of who I am. He and I have enjoyed a surprisingly monogamous relationship for 7 1/2 years (yes, really). We have a daughter together (and two older cubs from previous relationships). We might get married. Anything can happen.

Despite this, I still identify as bisexual. It's why I chose to perform a few years ago at my local pride celebration. I think, though, that the moment it was known that I was pregnant at the time, and madly in love with a man, the general attitude from the LGBTQIA community here towards me changed (and they even seemed to go out of their way to clarify at the next celebration that they were "looking for LGBT performers", as if I wasn't one). It hurt, and I said as much. But, y'know, nobody takes that sort of thing seriously, because bisexuality isn't a thing (sarcasm font on). ::pfft::

I have often asked, "Why even have the B in LGBTQIA if it's just going to be ignored, overlooked, shunned, mocked, and ridiculed by the rest of the community?" I never knew that there was so much bloody biphobia and bi erasure in the world, let alone in my own fxcking sect. There are people who still think that it is a phase, that I came out to be cute and trendy --even my own mother met it with a little scrutiny, but when she realised I was sincere, she relented.

According to the world, bisexual people are confused, greedy, promiscuous, in denial, psychotic--you name it. I'm here to tell you: WE. ARE. NOT. We know exactly what we want and who we are. And we know we can live life and love as we want to. Just because you might like savory and sweet things doesn't mean you have to enjoy both literally at the same damned time. It's the same for most of us. At least I know for sure it is for me. I'm bisexual, but I am not polyamorous. I learned my lesson with that the hard way; it is not for meows truly.

In the wake of SCOTUS' decision, a wave of rainbow euphoria spread across social media, and a wave of sheer hate did as well. I expected the hate (though I admit I was disappointed in where some of it was coming from, and what it was hiding behind). I didn't really expect that so many others, including but not limited to bisexuals, would feel as if they've been overlooked by the media, because it suddenly became all about "The Gay Agenda". They could have used phrases like "same-sex couples" and "marriage equality" as opposed to "gay marriage", a phrase which left the rest of the LGBTQIA community out of the celebration. Bi/Pan/Transsexuals are happy about this, too, y'know!

So, that is part of my reason for this headline. Maybe a better headline would have been "#LoveWins...But Did It Win For Everyone?"

I don't know. I'm happy, but we still have a long way to go.